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Does your border collie know something you don't? Date published: 12/4/2009 By Edie Gross WHEN YOU live with a border collie, it's pretty safe to assume they know something you don't. This is because they are the rocket scientists of the canine universe. While Afghan hounds and Irish setters slumber, border collies are hard at work on the day's most pressing issues, brainstorming how to trim the national deficit, stem global warming and fill the void sure to be left by Oprah's retirement. My husband and I came downstairs one morning to find our own border collie, The Bunk, splitting atoms with a rather effective device he'd fashioned from a curling iron, a Hot Wheels race track and a partially chewed bar of Dove soap. Because of his intellectual pursuits--The Bunk was actually a visiting professor of translational kinematics at MIT last year--I tend to pay special attention to some of the more subtle messages he sends. I've become especially concerned lately about his propensity for hoarding. The Bunk's got a little hidey-hole in the backyard, just to the left of our porch, and for the last month or so, he's been stashing all kinds of supplies there. If my beagle were engaging in this type of behavior, I wouldn't worry at all. Her actions almost always have something to do with her eternal longing for unfettered access to ham. But because he's a border collie, the roots of The Bunk's behavior go deeper. It's almost like he's getting ready for some major apocalyptic event that the rest of us don't know about. It all started a few weeks ago when my husband pulled a tray of hot cinnamon rolls out of the oven, then noticed that the can of pre-made icing he'd left on the kitchen counter was gone. I walked onto the back porch to see if either of the dogs had absconded with it, and sure enough, I spotted the can--licked clean--in The Bunk's hidey-hole. When I went to retrieve it, I noticed he had a pile of other goods in the hole as well, including the shredded remains of a Pepsi can, a container of chocolate Rice Dream organic ice cream, a pencil and an unopened bag of shallots. I figured he consumed the ice cream and soda during an all-night cram session for the bar exam. And he'd probably used the pencil to complete that morning's New York Times crossword puzzle.
Great Friday morning chuckle!
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