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Steve Reedal, a stay-at-home father, and his son, Tyler, take care of some grocery shopping. Four-year-old Tyler, who has epilepsy, is on a special diet that requires close attention when his Westmoreland County family is shopping for food.
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Dad likes role reversal

Stay-at-home dad stokes the home fires in King George


Date published: 9/7/2004

By KELLY HANNON

S Donna Reedal leaves for work each morning, 4-year-old Tyler stands at the front door and waves goodbye, his hand flailing until her car disappears.

Then Tyler goes inside the family's Westmoreland County home and starts his day. With his dad.

Steve Reedal, 32, is a full-time father. Most dads consider themselves full-time fathers, even if they are absent most of the day. But from 8 to 5, Reedal is the parent who provides the triage, in-the-trenches care--the cooking, the shopping, the cleaning and attending to every detail of Tyler's well-being.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there are an estimated 105,000 "stay-at-home" dads in the United States.

These men are married fathers with children under 15 who do not work--they stay home to provide their family's primary child care.

Before Steve Reedal took a turn at home, the family had other arrangements. At first, Tyler had a baby sitter. She retired when he was 2, so Donna stayed home with Tyler.

Steve never expected to have to leave his job as a firefighter in Spotsylvania County.

But then Tyler was diagnosed with epilepsy a year ago. The neurological condition was causing Tyler to have seizures, and the couple was making regular trips to Children's National Medical Center in Washington for doctor appointments.

Donna Reedal has a good job and generous benefits as a mechanical engineer at the Naval Surface Warfare Center at Dahlgren.

So they decided that, at least for a while, Steve Reedal would stay home to provide round-the-clock medical care for their son.

So far, it's been five months.

"At first, I was really nervous," Steve Reedal says. "I was like, 'What do you do all day?' Then I learned just do what comes naturally."

In some ways, his life today isn't vastly different. In his professional life, Steve Reedal put out fires.

Now, he just does it at home.

"Dad, don't forget to pack a ba-na-naaaaa," Tyler calls, waving the yellow fruit over his head. "I want a banana for a snack."

It's just before 9, and after two hours of breakfast, cartoons and playtime, the men are gearing up for errands.


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Date published: 9/7/2004