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Make eye contact, give a high-five, a pat on the shoulder or a cheerful greeting.
When talking to a person in a wheelchair, sit, so you're at eye level with them.
Give responsibilities. Let the person with special needs help as a greeter or with other tasks, such as putting address labels on newsletters, gathering church bulletins left on the pews, delivering snacks to the preschool classes and helping with service projects.
Establish routines. Many people with special needs thrive on routine. People with special needs can help with Jewish rituals by opening and closing the ark before the Torah is read, helping the reader turn pages and helping put away the prayer shawls after services.
Use compassion. Many religions exclude people with special needs from rituals such as baptism or communion. Talk with the family and with the individual before making the decision.
Use peers. Rotate partners close in age to the person with special needs. This promotes friendship.
Don't pretend to understand a person with limited speech. Ask them, politely, to repeat themselves more slowly.
Talk to the person directly, not through a companion or family member.
Don't treat adults with disabilities like children.
Above all, don't ignore the person. Everyone wants to be noticed.
Have the clergy member visit special-education classes and make special efforts to greet people with disabilities.
Offer accommodations: Scriptures in Braille, listening devices, wheelchair-accessible bathrooms and picture schedules.
Teaching tipsUse object lessons. Many people with disabilities need concrete examples.
Use the Scriptures. Encourage the person with special needs to hold the Bible, Torah or Quran open to the appropriate page.
Use pictures. Lots and lots of pictures.
Engage all the senses. Try to incorporate sight, sound, smell, taste and touch in the lesson.
Make lessons shorter. People with special needs often have shorter attention spans.
Be creative. If one way of teaching doesn't work, try another.
Use concrete examples. People with cognitive disabilities often have trouble understanding abstract ideas.
Be simple and direct.
Be patient and flexible.
Caring for caregiversOffer nonjudgmental support.
Train youth in the congregation to be sitters for children with disabilities.
Develop three or four congregational friends to provide care on a regular basis, so the caregiver can have some nights or weekends out.
Don't call and say, "How can I help?" Instead, say: "I'm bringing a casserole tomorrow night. Is there anything you need at the market, since I'm on my way?"
Send occasional notes, flowers or cards.
Hold activities for people with disabilities during the week. This assures the caregivers a night off.
Offer opportunities for caregivers to use their creative talents.
Start a Bible study or support group for caregivers.
--Information compiled from interviews, the book "That All May Worship" (available from nod.org) and from autism-society.org and nod.org.
