IF YOUR HEART is open to the possibility, you'll see signs of your loved ones, even after they've left this earth.
That's what I believe, anyway, and so do a lot of others, based on stories heard in recent weeks.
They're not creepy tales from the crypt, but comforting reminders that even though those we love have moved on to a better place, they're still with us.
The stories started with the family of Roger Wright, the Rappahannock Electric Cooperative worker who was killed in a helicopter crash in June 2003.
His wife, Tracy, and children, Randy and Courtney, have been touched, and sometimes, awed by the signs around them.
For instance, soon after Roger's death, folks in Caroline County dedicated a tree in his honor at the field where he loved to coach youth baseball.
In the midst of the ceremony, a hovering helicopter appeared.
Now, choppers come and go from nearby Fort A.P. Hill all the time, but this one flew really low and lingered for what seemed liked a long time--and you'd better believe everyone at the ceremony noticed.
There have been times when Tracy was down, and she turned on the radio, only to hear a certain tune she and Roger enjoyed or a song played in his memory at the funeral. Once, at the beach during family vacation, Tracy was feeling really alone when a blackbird appeared--and landed on the chair beside her.
It wasn't a seagull or some bird routinely seen at the beach, but a raven that cawed at her for a few moments before it pounced on the cooler.
That's when Tracy was sure it was a sign from Roger, a bear of a man who was always looking for something to eat. No wonder the bird went right for the food, she thought.
Carol Graham, who used to live in Stafford County, believes her husband, Mark, heard from his sons at the moment he needed it most.
The Grahams lost their two sons, Kevin and Jeff, in eight months. Kevin was 21 when he hanged himself in June 2003. He suffered from depression and had stopped taking his medicine because he didn't want it to show up on an Army medical exam. Jeff was 24 when he was killed in Iraq by a roadside bomb.
Mark Graham, a colonel in the Army, was pondering what to do with his career--and his life--now that his two boys were gone, his wife said.
He happened to be in Georgia at Fort Benning, where Kevin earned his airborne wings. It happened to be Jeff's birthday. He asked his aide to take him to the spot where Kevin would have landed after jumping out of an airplane.
As Mark stood in the open field, thinking about life without the men who shared his name, he got a phone call. His commander told him he'd been selected to be promoted to general.
"It was like the boys were saying, 'Dad, we're with you. Keep going. You're right where you're supposed to be,'" Carol said during a phone interview last month.
Not all the signs are as gigantic as helicopters or as weighty as promotions. Some are as delicate as the paperlike wings of a bug.
A co-worker who lost her mother to cancer was leaving the funeral when she saw a swarm of dragonflies. It wasn't even the time of year when the insects are supposed to be out, so it probably won't surprise you that her mother happened to be a big fan of dragonflies.
You've heard similar stories. Friends and relatives of those who loved cardinals or wolves, ladybugs or butterflies will see an image of those beings in the most unlikely places and be reminded of the one who's gone.
Are they messages from the afterlife or just coincidences? Each of us is free to think what we like.
I'll always share the belief of a mother I met, whose son, Vincent, was diagnosed with leukemia when he was 5. After he died, the mom found a few Legos, his favorite toys, in the oddest places. She'd pick up the treasured plastic pieces, slip them into her pocket, and say, "Vincent says hello."
To reach CATHY DYSON: 540/374-5425 cdyson@freelancestar.com