The best in fashion advice and dissent!

Date published: 3/31/2005

Sarah's tip No. 1: Something horrible has happened. Fashion magazines everywhere report that the chunky platform disco sandal styles are in for the summer, and all the elegant styles of last year are out.

Platforms make you walk like a robot and make calves look enlarged. They are not in the least elegant. Unless you have a passion for the '70s, this trend is best avoided.

Nate-Dogg: What's wrong with the '70s? Some of the best music came from the '70s and the disco movement in general. Do the words KC and the Sunshine Band ring any bells?

Anyway, I love the '70s but simply choose not to wear platforms because I already happen to be like 6 foot 3--and, despite my excessively hot features, would have a relatively hard time finding a dance partner if she was only at chest level.

The Jesman: I'm glad I'm not a girl. Y'all have it rough--bras, high heels and various fragrances are norms for your kind.

It's fun being a guy--smelling bad, dirty sneakers and looking like a bum are expected.So, this disco platform look you speak of will be no part of my wardrobe. I'll stick with my old, grimy New Balances.

Sarah's tip No. 2: Well, prom is almost herethere's nothing more that the guys dread than looking for the tux. They're expensive and not usually interesting.

Why not look in thrift/vintage stores to pick out your prom garb? Everything is less costly and much more diverse-looking.

Nate-Dogg: I know we are in college now, but high school was not that long ago. If you can recall prom night, most guys will tell you: The tux is not high on their minds that night.

The Jesman: The Jesman loves a nice thrift store. The other day, I found a vintage Armani suit for $3 at the Mary Washington Shoppe.

Some rich guy from the country club must have gotten bored and chucked his riches toward the poor folk like me. Thank you, kind sir, wherever you are.

Date published: 3/31/2005