Parenting styles run the gamut

What impact do you think your parenting style has on your children?

Date published: 7/25/2006

By KIM BAER

WE RECENTLY joined a community swimming pool, but our 4-year-old daughter has yet to dip a toe into the "big" pool.

It's ridiculous, I know, but I've been too nervous to take her into the water. She has a life vest. Of course I would hold onto her tight. There are lifeguards. Still, I haven't taken the plunge.

My hesitation got me thinking about different parenting personalities. My sister-in-law, who has four children, has no trouble diving in.

A couple of years ago, we all took a weekend trip to Virginia Beach. My daughter was 2 at the time. My husband wanted to take her into the ocean.

But when he took her to the water's edge, the waves suddenly looked so, well, big. It seemed as if a wave could very easily knock our daughter out of his hands.

He came back up to the shore. My sister-in-law couldn't believe it.

"Let me take her," she said.

She confidently walked her into the water and bounced her up and down in the waves. They both came back smiling and happy.

I'm sure part of her confidence has come from raising four children. Still, I think parenting personality also plays a role. My husband and I tend to be nervous Nellies. My sister-in-law is not.

Parenting style is an issue on a lot of parents' minds, judging by the 4.8 million responses that come back from a Google search on the subject.

You can take parenting style quizzes online and read articles by well-known psychologists about the impact of parenting styles on children.

Here are a couple of links: "Does parenting style up kids' weight?" and "Early parenting style significant in how a child turns out?" No pressure there, huh?

Dr. Phil even throws his two cents in on his Web site, drphil.com.

We all know the basic stereotypes: authoritarian parents will raise fearful children; permissive parents will raise selfish you-know-whats. But I'm sure most of us are probably somewhere in the middle.

What do you think your parenting style is? Are you a free-spirit parent or more wary of letting your children try new things?

Do you subscribe to a specific style, such as attachment parenting, or do you tend to make it up as you go along? Is there anything you'd like to change about your style?

What impact do you think your parenting style has on your children? Send me your responses and I'll share some in a future column.

To reach KIM BAER:540/368-5028
Email: kbaer@freelancestar.com

Follow us on

Date published: 7/25/2006