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Blues-rocker Kenny Wayne Shepherd should get plenty of material from his new in-law.
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Dishing It

Lindsay's trippin', K-Fed will die eventually, Mel's daughter defects and apparently Willie Nelson likes the wacky tobaccy

Date published: 9/21/2006

Her boots are made for fallin'

In what must be a record for most visits to the ER in one year by a person not terminally ill, Lindsay Lohan was rushed to St. Vincent's in New York City last Friday after she slipped in her Chanel boots at a fashion-week party.

The tumble resulted in a fractured wrist, which she stylishly sports in a white cast on her emaciated left arm.

Perhaps this is simple karma for the scream-fest she had with her mother, Dina, on Dina's birthday. Basically every patron at Phillipe could confirm that mother and daughter verbally duked it out over several courses--of alcohol--before Lindsay stormed out shouting, "Go to hell," while her mother sat in tears. I can't wait for this "E! True Hollywood Story."

Flatline for Federline

If you're sick of the hillbilly circus that is K-Fed and Britney , here's some great news: Kevin will be around only for the next 26 years.

This assessment was made in the latest issue of Blender magazine. Factors taken into consideration were Kevin's age, weight, height, love of alcohol and smoky vices. The mag predicts that K-Fed will live to a whopping 55 years old.

Okay, so 26 more years sounds like a long time for him to live, but that means he's peaked, so his pseudo-celebrity status should last another 18 months before he closes out his career with a slew of infomercials.

But I'm sure Mr. Spears isn't worried about it. Now that he's fathered two kids with Britney (Sutton Pierce Federline is the alleged name of the newest member), he's set for life.

Wedding like 'blue on black'

When shame has been brought to a family, the best way to overcome it is by throwing a wedding (think "The Birdcage"). So, hopefully we'll all be able to put to rest that ugly, drunken, anti-Semitic episode Mel Gibson had a little while ago, and focus on his daughter's marriage to a very well-to-do blues-rock guitarist.

Mel's daughter, Hannah Gibson, wed Kenny Wayne Shepherd in California last Saturday. I'm sure it was a beautiful Catholic wedding sans any alcohol, so as not to tempt the father of the bride.


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Date published: 9/21/2006