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As health fades, 83-year-old Stafford man focuses on dominoes Date published: 2/27/2008
By CATHY DYSON Tom Faulk can't keep track of the details anymore. He doesn't remember how long he was in the Air Force, when he got married or if he's taken his morning medicine. But put a game of dominoes in front of the 83-year-old, and his focus becomes clear. He shuts out everything but counting "pips," or points on the domino tiles. The Stafford County man will play for eight to 10 hours at a stretch. He doesn't stop to eat, and he's not interested in television, reading or going to gatherings for seniors. If he's not playing, he's sleeping. "I told him he should change his name to 'Domino King' Faulk," said Tommy Bartley, his son-in-law. Faulk's obsession with dominoes may have something to do with dementia. He played the game as a child "because we were poor folks, and that's all we had when I was growing up," he said. "Everybody around where I lived played dominoes." As Faulk's health failed and a daytime caretaker became necessary, he picked up the game again. His family's unusual living arrangement--and perhaps, even his domino playing--may have kept him and his wife, Mary, who also suffers from dementia, out of nursing homes. The Faulks live with their daughter and son-in-law, Marilyn and Tommy Bartley. The Faulks lived in Dale City and the Bartleys in Spotsylvania County until the older couple had problems. Tom Faulk suffers with chronic back pain and had to go to a nursing home for rehabilitation three times in recent years. The Bartleys were trying to care for their parents and maintain two homes. As things worsened, both couples sold their houses, pooled resources and built a new handicap-accessible home. They moved to Falmouth in November 2006. But there was still the issue of daytime care for the Faulks. The Bartleys checked into various services, but couldn't handle the cost or having strangers in their home. About the same time, Tommy Bartley's brother, Benford, retired after 30 years with the Prince William-Manassas Regional Adult Detention Center. Benford Bartley, a retired correctional officer, decided he'd rather care for the couple than work at a discount store. He takes them to doctors appointments, dispenses medicine and, most importantly for Tom Faulk, plays dominoes. "It was like a puzzle that fit together," said Marilyn Bartley. "It's really worked out well." Benford Bartley makes enough to cover his health insurance, and his brother and sister-in-law have peace of mind. "It's just a family looking out for each other," Benford Bartley said. Cathy Dyson: 540/374-5425
Date published: 2/27/2008
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