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Programs for volatile custody cases to end

April 3, 2008 12:15 am

BY AMY FLOWERS UMBLE

When he took the bench 8 years ago, Judge Joseph Ellis saw many child custody cases get ugly.

Separated parents would come into his Spotsylvania County juvenile and domestic relations courtroom after getting into fistfights while exchanging custody of their children.

They'd flood court dockets with show cause orders, complaining the child came over in dirty clothes or that the child hated to see the other parent.

In the past five years, those situations have almost disappeared.

"I expect I'm going to see them again," Ellis said Monday.

Two programs that helped calm volatile emotions of custody cases will close April 30. Family Solutions has offered the programs--Safe Exchange and supervised visitation--for nearly five years.

During that time, the state-licensed agency near Spotsylvania Courthouse has lost considerable money on both programs.

Director Anne Henley didn't give an exact figure but said her agency lost several thousand dollars last year alone.

"The programs are so valuable, you can't really measure it by figures," Henley said. Since November 2003, both programs have served hundreds of children.

Safe Exchange offers a neutral place for custody swaps, allowing separated parents to drop off their children without seeing each other.

Before the program, Ellis sometimes ordered parents to exchange their children in public places or sheriff's offices because they couldn't see each other without fighting.

He heard about Safe Exchange at a judges' conference and was amazed at its simplicity. He brought the concept home, and Henley, a licensed clinical social worker with a private agency, took on the project.

She saw benefits right away, and people came from as far away as Maryland to participate in Safe Exchange.

But it lost money from the beginning. It cost participants $20 per exchange, and Henley increased prices to $30. But she worried that if she kept increasing the price, parents couldn't afford it.

Liability insurance and staffing cost more than the agency earned. The program requires trained, experienced monitors willing to work on weekends. Henley said she couldn't hire just anyone.

"I mean, these parents can't even be in a room together," she said.

The supervised visitation program provides neutral supervision when the court says a parent could only be with their child if another adult is around.

"This is where we keep the child safe, not just physically but emotionally. There are a whole host of reasons that people come here," said program manager Toni Armstrong. "The fact of the matter is that this is where the children are protected by a third party."

A trained monitor makes sure the parent doesn't discuss the custody case with the child or insult the other parent. The monitor also takes extensive notes on the child's interaction with the parent.

Often those notes help prove or disprove abuse allegations, said Brenda Green, a local family attorney and guardian ad litem, which is a court-appointed advocate for a child involved in a case.

Many parents have supervised visitation as part of their custody agreements. Supervision is warranted when, for example, there is an allegation abuse; or because a parent hasn't had contact with the child; or if a child seems scared of a parent.

Without a program to provide the visitation, courts will rely on family friends and relatives, Ellis said. That's not a good solution, because it's hard for parents to agree on someone and because a relative isn't always unbiased, he said.

Many court orders now specify the supervised visitation take place at Family Solutions because those custody agreements will have to go back to court.

Without the programs, Green said, "This is going to clog up our juvenile and domestic relations court, I would expect."

Amy Flowers Umble: 540/735-1973
Email: aumble@freelancestar.com