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Man uses fish, private parts to earn trip to jail Date published: 6/3/2008
BY KEITH EPPS A series of incidents involving a fish and his own private parts landed a Fredericksburg man in jail Sunday, police said. City police spokeswoman Natatia Bledsoe said the suspect's troubles started Saturday about 8:30 a.m. at the 7-Eleven on Dixon Street. Three people were at the gas pumps when the suspect entered the store. The witnesses said they noticed the suspect because he was singing very loudly. A 40-year-old man was looking at the suspect when he came out of the store still being loud. This caught the attention of the suspect, who picked up a rock and hit the man in the neck. Bledsoe said the man's 32-year-old friend then got out of the car and confronted the suspect about throwing the rock. The suspect grabbed a fish out of his car and hit the friend in the face with it. The suspect threw a beer bottle onto the vehicle at the gas pump, which belonged to the fish victim's girlfriend. Witnesses said he dropped his pants and flashed his private parts to all three. The suspect, who the victims said they didn't know, drove off before police arrived. But Bledsoe said police got a photo from the store's security camera and took it around the neighborhood. Residents identified the suspect as 21-year-old Marcellus Coleman. On Sunday, police got a tip that Coleman was in an abandoned house on Myrick Street. Police found him there and took him into custody. Bledsoe said that as Coleman was being led to the police cruiser, he spit on a resident who he apparently believed informed police of his whereabouts. The spitting led to an assault charge. Coleman was also charged with malicious wounding, destruction of property and indecent exposure. He was placed in the Rappahannock Regional Jail under no bond. Keith Epps: 540/374-5404
So, this guy was singing loudly and slapped someone with a fish.
Obviously violence on television has corrupted him.
What was he singing?
"I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK
I sleep all night
and I work all day"
Fish are friends not weapons!
fish are for eating
not for swinging
have fun in jail
There should be a mandatory waiting period of 21 days to purchase a fish, but then again the fish wouldn't be fresh then so what would be the point. And stop those lobbyiests with the NFA (national Fishmongers Assn) and their claims that fish don't kill people. I saw Jaws. ;-)
The only people who need rocks are stone masons and the police. The least we can do is background checks on everyone who buys rocks at rock concerts. Close the rock concert loophole!
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