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A portrait taken in Germany this spring shows Ursula, Milton Sears' girlfriend during World War II, and their daughter, Barbel Hoeldtke.
Milton Sears, 80, and his daughter, Barbel Hoeldtke, had never met until Sears visited Germany this spring. She's visiting him now. |
By CATHY DYSON
After all the time they've been apart, father and daughter are more than willing to cross an ocean to see each other.
Milton Sears and Bärbel Hoeldtke are happy together, whether they're talking about everyday events in his Spotsylvania County kitchen or looking at photo albums at her home in northwestern Germany.
He enjoys a bond that formed between them so quickly, it surprised him. She feels complete, like she has finally found the part of her that was missing.
But because the two didn't meet until she was 59, both wonder what their lives might have been like.
A certain sadness hangs in the air, until both acknowledge they need to focus on the time they have left.
"I'm only glad to find you," Hoeldtke said to Sears, who's 80, as she sat on the couch beside him. "I feel like I know you all my life."
The two, who were featured in The Free Lance-Star this spring, met for the first time in April when Sears flew to Germany. Hoeldtke returned the favor this month, when she and her husband and daughter came for a three-week visit.
Sears fell in love with Hoeldtke's mother, Ursula, when he was stationed in Germany after World War II. He didn't know she was pregnant when he returned to Virginia.
Ursula wrote him several letters, but never got an answer. Sears found them after his mother died in 1994; she'd kept them from him because she didn't approve of the relationship.
Hoeldtke regularly asked for information about her father, but was told nothing more than that he was an American soldier.
Ursula revealed his name in 1997, and Hoeldtke--who was married with three children by then--and her family began what turned into an 11-year search to find Sears.
A German television station that specializes in reuniting families contacted both of them, and the two made plans to meet.
Both were excited and nervous. Sears told his daughter he'd be wearing a "USA" hat when he got off the plane in Germany, and Hoeldtke brought her whole family to meet him.
"It's just like a coach and team meeting for the first time, you don't know what to expect," said Sears, who quickly bonded with the family. "It was very close. I didn't expect it to be that close."
Sears also reunited with the woman he had wanted to marry. Their daughter decided they needed to talk things out alone.
Sears learned that Ursula had married and had three more children, then lost her husband in 1996. She still lives in the same house where they met and stays busy with senior activities and singing in a group.
She has gotten over the anger she harbored against Sears.
"It's too long ago to be angry anymore," Hoeldtke said.
Sears invited Ursula to Virginia, and she said she might make the next trip.
"I told her, 'When you get here, I'm not gonna let you go back,' " Sears said, laughing.
He and his daughter are making plans to move, but it's not clear which side of the Atlantic Ocean they'll pick. When she retires in six years, she and her husband may move to the Fredericksburg area, or Sears may relocate in Germany.
"We want to be together," Sears said.
Cathy Dyson: 540/374-5425
Email: cdyson@freelancestar.com
| 1943: Milton Sears, 16, leaves the Chesapeake area of Virginia to fight in World War II. 1946: In Germany, he falls in love with Ursula, an interpreter in the office where he investigates Nazi war crimes. AUGUST 1948: Sears is sent stateside, unaware that Ursula is pregnant with his child. APRIL 1949: Ursula gives birth to a baby girl, Bärbel. Ursula writes Sears several letters, but never gets a response. 1994: Sears discovers, after his mother's death, that she kept Ursula's letters from him. 1997: After Bärbel begged her mother for years for information about her father, Ursula reveals his name. Bärbel's son, Stephan, begins the search for him. JANUARY 2008: A German TV station connects the father and daughter, who talk to each other for the first time. APRIL 2008: Sears meets his daughter in Germany. SEPTEMBER 2008: Bärbel and family visit Fredericksburg. |
