BY FRANK DELANO

"I'm not a garbage man. I'm a garbologist. To be a certified garbologist, you have to entertain your customers," said Herald Newnum.

Newnum, 62, works at the Monroe Hall collection site near Colonial Beach. He keeps his gloves in his hip pocket, a repertoire of hundreds of old country songs in his head and his guitar strapped over his shoulder.

"Play something by Hank Williams," requested a man, dumping a tangle of old garden hose into a bin.

Newnum was quick to oblige:

The man grinned and applauded. "I never thought I'd be entertained at the dump!" he said.

"I try to make it a very pleasant experience," said Newnum. "People tell me it's not like going to the dump anymore; it's an experience."

Pickups piled with trash rolled in. Newnum directed traffic.

"I'm sorry, sir, we can't take any wood or building materials here. That has to go to Montross," he told one driver.

Sam Haffner of Oak Grove, a regular customer, stopped his minivan at the compactor.

"You gotta sing a tune here to dump your garbage, or do you get a song?" he asked Newnum.

Newnum rushed over to Haffner and sang the chorus of Willie Nelson's "Seven Spanish Angels."

Haffner got a Christmas card last year from Newnum signed "Your local garbologist."

Haffner waved goodbye. "Keep'em smiling," he said.

"I try to. Thank you, my friend," Newnum said.

The phone rings. Newnum goes inside the office hut to answer it.

"Monroe Hall Convenience Site operated by Waste Management. My name's Herald. How can I help you? Yes, sir, you can bring a mattress here. No problem. Thank you, sir," he said.

"There's no reason you can't be courteous all the time," he said to a visitor. "When customers show up, you want to treat them right. If it weren't for them, I wouldn't have a job."